Have Been on a Roller Coaster Ride...

It has been a tough week... Because Benson is having Fever due to MMR & also teething... & life is not smooth for me... I have been feeling super tired of somethings... & have been on deep thts on many things... Many things changed... & will never be the same anymore... Sometime is just the small little things that does the biggest changes... I admitted i'm weak.. I cannot handle the changes... & I'm the one who get hurt in the end... Because 我把感情看的太重, 我的泪流在心里学会放弃..... People will think that i'm the actor in my own drama... But who cares... & this is what i feel now...

I will hope that Benson will recover soon & i won't give a damm to other issue anymore... Because i'm really tired... Really... Is time for me to really put down my pressure on my shoulder.. it have been killing me... I did my part as a wife & a mummy.. & I won't regret... If the ego is covering ur eyes to even say a sorry for ur mistake.. There is really no point that this can carry on... If u think that i will always be the one who say sorry.. U r so wrong.. Because I will not care anymore... Be it if u feel that i can't live without u... Just to say.. Yes i can... U have just made me a stronger person... If u thinks that i'm always the one picking a quarrel .. then u r wrong.. Because i not so free everyday to pick quarrels... 心疼也有停止的时候  , 泪也有停止的时候  ...

U r not who u used to be or Maybe i been asking too much.. Or maybe we should ask ourself.. Do we really know the person well even we r both sleeping on the same bed every night?? Whenever i think about this.. my heart teared... my tears flow... But there will be a day.. the tear will stop forever...

Nothing hurts more than realizing they meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to them.               

Happy 2nd Father's Day...

Happy Father's Day to My Lovely Lovely Hubby... & Father of Benson... Thanks for giving us such a wonderful home.... & a chance for me to stay home taking care of Benson... =) I know is hard on u... & U r working really hard for us... & Thanks being there for us... More Father's Day to come.. =) We Love u Lots...

Poor Benson =(

Benson Having Fever since Thursday... =( Must be the MMR & Teething.. His fever stop on Friday.. Then Saturday Continue till Sunday which is Today... Then highest is 38.2... I was worried.. Every Parent will sure get super worry if their baby is sick.. so poor thing la... =( Today he seem more sleepy... Hubby say maybe he is just tired... arrr.. Maybe i think too much... Then just now Benson vomitted alot after i feed him milk.. i hope is just some indigestion & nothing much... I just rub some ru yi oil on his back & tummy... Hope he sleep well tonight.. Because we both never get much sleep since his fever came... & His food intake drop super lots... I think he will slim down quite alot after this... I pray & hope he recover soon...

Hubby Frenz Came for Dinner & chill out at our house Yesterday... Hope that next time got more of this kind of gathering... =) & Yesterday Because meeting them.. Hubby bring me for my backache treatment..This backache problem had been hunting me for years.... Queen intro this chinese doc across her block...But is so damm painful...  & i got blue black today... Hubby bought the package for me... 4 plus 1 free... @ $100... Hopefully it works... Below is the picture of the blue black hubby taken.. Sorry for the fats that u will be seeing in the pic...

Benson 15 Months 3 Weeks & Family Dinner...

Benson is already 15 Months 3 Weeks le... Soon he will be 16 Months.. Super excited for him.. =) Lately he had been having teething problem... He will cry at times with one finger is sticking in his mouth... & wanted me to hug him.. I took a look.. & realize... that actually quite a number of tooth is growing at the same time... =.= Which mean is super painful for him... Lately he head bang start again.. i went to read \up again... It wrote.. it might be because of teething that's y some % of babies will head bang.. The head banging peak for them is abt 18 Months to 24 Months... I hope it will stop soon.. & hope he won't hurt himself... Nowdays It took him jusr seconds to get up the sofa... With a blink of my eye he is already up there... =.= Super worried one day he will accidentally fell down to the floor.. My heart is drop whenever i see him up there.. We r lucky that we decided to fix window grill when we doing renov... if not it will be more dangerous for him to climb up...

Lately i had pack his toy... is super duper lots de lo... Cannot imagine that is so much till 2 box also cannot finish packing all in.. no wonder Hubby always complain about his toy.. Now i really realize is too much.. Haha... But some toys is not working anymore.. so i will be throwing that away.. & also packed some of Benson clothes that is too small & decided to give it away.. BUT...Cannot imagine one mummy still can ask for the photo of the clothes.. Since i'm giving away.. why should i let people choose? Hello.. is free lei.... ZZZ..... =.=

Today Went to Shi Ma Lu... to pray with Mum & Daddy.. & Nephew.. Had lunch there too then walk walk.. Then went mum place.. go see chinese doc for my backache problem... =.= but my arm is sore now... Feel like a super old lady... Think i old liao will jialat.... Then night Sister ask us to go Sakura Dinner... With Dad & Mum... Hubby meet us after work... Had a great day... =)

The sweety Pie that i cannot live without...

Benson has really becoming very fun to play with.. he will do all sort of reaction.. My day really brighten by his smile.. =) I cannot imagine my life without him now.. & our love grow stronger & stronger everyday.. I think i'm gonna miss him when he goes school... He now will shake his head no no if he does not want something... & will start to sign with his hand to let u know what he want... He now eat more of his solid liao.. Finally.. I'm so scare that he will be under weight.. =X i hope not... When he is upset he will say ma ma.. or papa... & when he knock his head.. he will touch his head to let u know he is in pain.. & nag & cry all the way walking to us... & wanna a hug from us... He love to dance all around the house when he hear music... =) & he sometime will stand at the gate while i'm kitchen & yell Mummy.. LOL.. very very cute... =)

I admit i'm really a lazy mummy =(... i tends to stick at home at times... I really feel so bad for him...  I should have bring him to the park & playground.. let him had more fun... Today Mum , Sis & my nephew came... & i cooked dinner today.. because we r not going out due to Benson is having fever.. They joined us for dinner.. & after that i send them down with Benson.. because Benson is super upset when he knows they r leaving... After they hop in the taxi... i bring Benson to the park & playground.. Can see that he loved it.. & keep walking around.. I should bring him to park more often.. I promise... =)

My worst nightmare...

Bring Benson for his MMR on last Saturday.. Have been postpone before because of hos flu & cough.. So since he recover... I decided to bring him to get his Jan done.. I tht is the last jab till he is much older.. But I was wrong.. Nurse told us he still left with one more Jab.. Which Is abt end of Sep.. =( my heartache moments again.. Whenever Benson Jab.. My heart will turn sour.. His MMR jab fever set in today... Which is 2 days after the jab.. This morning took temp.. Is 37.4.. Now after Feed medicine.. Drop back to 36.9.. Phew.. Hopefully it won't get too high.. This week will be a stay home week.. Because a Friend of mine advise.. Say that better to stay home.. Because scare that he will kana infection or virus.. Because it happened to her daughter.. so is better to listen & tahan.. I'm glad & blessed that.. There is alot of caring friends out there.. & of course family members... Mum just called just now.. Asking if Benson is ok.. Pls let Benson's fever go away.. =)

I'm feeling sick too.. Think I'm having throat infection on the right side of my throat.. Feeling sore.. Starting from ytd.. & I keep feeling lacking of sleep.. Even I took nap ytd afternoon.. Having headache too.. Slight of too heaty.. Will go cook some barley later.. So we all can drink including Benson.. Flush out all the heat & toxic.. Cooking watery porridge too.. Because my granny taught me when i staying at Serangoon... Whenever baby is sick.. can give the porridge water... =)

Benson now weight is 9.7kg... is under the 50% in the chart... Nurse say.. as long as he is growing should be ok..

Sunday We went to Vivo then to Sentosa to see the crane show.. LOL.. We walk all the way in.. Because the path link way from Vivo to Sentosa is ready... Super nice walk way.. but a little hot... & is a good place for dating couple & Family... =) Very clean as well.. on the way.. we will walk pass some cafe.. looks very good... & the price is quite ok... Someday will go there to have lunch or dinner.. I hope so.. =) Then we just paid $1 for the entry to Sentosa with our ezlink card... We r just in time for the show... Phew... But too bad.. no fireworks... =( After the show finish we go walk around a while the took a cab back from Resort world... Extra $3 ... =.= But the quene is super fast... It was a simple outing.. but i love it...